Britney Spears Released From Hospital, Hilarity Ensues: [B]y now you’ve probably guessed that Britney Spears has been given an early release from her padded room in the psychiatric hospital where she was being held. And you probably also guessed that, now she’s been medically classified as Gravely Disabled, the paparazzi and press would back off and let her recover out of basic human decency. And you’re right – Britney Spears’ release was only followed by 20 car-swarming paparazzi, two news helicopters and everyone watching the live feed of Britney leaving the hospital and driving through Los Angeles on TV at home. Which is sort of backing off a bit, right? No? Fair enough.  — Heckler Spray

Britney Spears’ life hasn’t changed: It has been really quiet without pictures to post of Britney Spears. But when she got out of the hospital yesterday, every one was quick to get pictures of her again. This clip is pretty bad…she is just stopped at a light and they all rush at her. — Taylor’s Entertainment News

Britney Spears in the hospital = financial pain for the leeches: There are two things in America that matter most: Sex and Celebrity. Combine the two and you are money. The Portfolio Magazine article claiming Britney Spears’ contribution to the American economy is upwards of $120 million suggests that any lengthy stays in rehab or the hospital will cause financial pain to the leeches that live off her. Were the paparazzis and glossies glad to see her as she left the hospital today, or were they wanting a paycheck? — Without Politicians

Britney Spears will be an excellent Scientologist, by Tom Cruise: I was thinking the other day. Just … thinking. And I do my best thinking when I’m laughing at my reflection in the mirror, pulling at my face until I can see the red under my eyes … so I was doing that, too. And you know what occurred to me? There is someone out there who needs my help, someone who needs to be taught KRQ and the moral code, and I am the only person who can help her. I’m talking about Britney Spears. — Newsgroper

What Britney Spears did with her day of freedom: I like the part about how she dumped her bodyguard on the side of the road and then had an X-17 paparazzi drive her car. Then the constant building of police officers definitely raised the tension of the story, but the ending kind of fell flat if you ask me. I wanted her to come out with an eye-patch and speaking in a new accent saying “whar’s the harbor matey?” as she tried to confuse the paparazzi. That would have been so much better because pirates are cool. Everyone knows that. — Popscribe