Early one morning, a neighbour who has been summering down the coast was telling Constant Gardener — the dog leash community — the news about her labrador.

She’d been walking on the beach and pooch had gone exploring. She found it further on, chewing on something near what had been obviously been a bbq site from the night before, strewn with the usual youthful detritus.

Back at the beach house she noticed that Pooch (not its real name) had become very quiet, indeed, paralytic. Extremely alarmed she rushed to the nearest vet. What’s wrong with Pooch? she cried.

While inspecting, the vet inquired her where they had been that morning and if there had been unusual circumstances. She recounted their route; beach, bbq, home. Oh, and chewing on something.

Vet: Hmm. I think your dog’s high.

She: What!

Vet: Yes. Pooch is stoned, probably ingested marijuana.

Pooch recovered later in the day, no harm done.

(Update: I wuz wrong. Pooch was actually very sick, had toxicity tests and was put on a drip; but has evidently recovered. So, pooch people, please: no chocolate, and no grass.)

Image by Pokstad.