Bill Shorten is a guy who has attracted nicknames all his life. Being a Bill helps, but being him is the clincher. I found 16 from university to now, but my dream is to have ready down the track the complete list. Can Crikey readers help? Fresh inventions won’t be rejected out of hand, but what was he called at school, at Monash, in the union, in the factions, in Parliament, round the traps? Here’s what we have so far:
Monash University
I Finally Won Something Shorten — Lot’s Wife, 1987
Bill “Career-Move” Shorten — Lot’s Wife, 1987
AWU
Golden Boy — his staff, 2001
Bye Bye Bill — factional opponents, 2002
King Billy — workers, Nonferral Pty Ltd, 2005
Showbag Shorten — AWU, by 2005
The ET of Spring Street — Bob Sercombe, ousted Member for Maribyrnong, 2005
Little Billy Shorten — Mark Latham, 2005
Braveheart — factional foes, 2006
Government
Bill the Knife — various, July 2013
Opposition
Electricity Bill — Tony Abbott, October 2013
The Prince of Darkness — Kathy Jackson, 2014
Adora-Bill — his staff, early 2014
Mr Potato Head — Christopher Pyne, March 2014
Bull Shittin — Derryn Hinch, April 2014
Barnacle Bill — Tony Abbott, November 2014
*This is an extract from David Marr’s Quarterly Essay on Shorten, “Faction Man”
Biff Slotcar.
I know First Dog has moved on, but as a fellow Guardian writer, David should be aware of the plethora of variants (e.g. Blunt Spoonbill) featuring in FDOTM’s cartoons
Incisive journalism at its best.
I usually like David Marr’s stuff and I admit that as yet I have only skimmed his Quarterly Essay, yet to read it properly. But from what I have read, Marr seems to put a slightly derogatory connotation on everything that Shorten has done which I think it quite unfair.
Bibly shortsun,
Fills Should-have-brought-em,
Bill’s Steakhouse,
Shill Borten,
Biff Shogun,
Sheer Boredom