Senator Ted Cruz (Image: AP)

Cruz control It’s amazing and curious to find Australia inspiring in US cultural warriors the same mythic frontier fantasies the United States has for so long evoked here. We’ve inspired the #AustraliaHasFallen movement, protests at the Australian embassy in New York, and now US senator and slowly-deflating-balloon-with-a frowny-face-painted-on Ted Cruz is jumping aboard. In response to the Northern Territory’s strict vaccine mandates, Cruz tweeted: “I love the Aussies. Their history of rugged independence is legendary; I’ve always said Australia is the Texas of the Pacific. The Covid tyranny of their current government is disgraceful & sad. Individual liberty matters.”

He’s always said that, folks.

NT Chief Minister Michael Gunner was happy to extinguish the myth, pointing out the obvious fact that has escaped many of the Americans fretting on our behalf: Australia in general has taken a very statist approach to its COVID response, and whatever might be said about that, it’s been broadly supported and has saved a lot of lives: “Nearly 70,000 Texans have tragically died from COVID-19. There have been zero deaths in the Territory. Did you know that?”

We dimly suspect Cruz did not know that, and had no plans to check.

House of as few people as possible While there has understandably been much annoyance at the different rules applied to politicians’ freedom of movement as opposed to ordinary citizens’ — exemplified by Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s jaunt home for Father’s Day — perhaps we can take solace that, as most eastern states slouch towards something like freedom, politicians and their staff are still subject to greatly restricted moment (at least in Canberra).

In a letter sent to all MPs, House Speaker Tony Smith and outgoing Senate President Scott Ryan set out the restrictions in place for the next sitting fortnight. Only staff who are “genuinely and absolutely essential” and cannot work from home will be allowed into Parliament. Further, we hear that MPs and staffers from Melbourne may be allowed to move only between their accommodation and Parliament.

Political wizardry There’s no other way to put it, folks: Christchurch has fired its official wizard. Ian Channell has collected a salary of NZ$16,000 from the city council for more than 20 years to “provide acts of wizardry and other wizard-like-services — as part of promotional work for the city of Christchurch”. Very cool use of public money!

The contractual arrangement was brought to an end after Channell made some gross jokes about domestic violence on New Zealand Today (“Never strike a woman because they bruise too easily is the first thing, and they’ll tell the neighbours and their friends … and then you’re in big trouble”). Somehow, we expect the usual people who cry “cancel culture!” might let this one through to the keeper.

A handy guide to climate change gymnastics, part four With the Coalition “inching” towards a target of net zero by 2050 (or so we’re constantly told…), a lot of people are having to perform real contortions on the subject of climate change action. Even News Corp is on board (sort of). To help you keep track, our friend and colleague Mitchell Squire has put together a handy list of climate change gymnastics routines.

Today it’s a move the federal opposition excels in, the balance beam:

A favourite of the Australian Labor Party. When performed correctly the athlete assumes a position so balanced as to appear positionless. The athlete can lead with the right or left foot as determined by the electorate hosting their performance.