Tomorrow’s papers will be full of news and comment on the RBA’s rates announcement. It’ll be a cut, but the story is in how deep and what that might mean. Divining truth from the plethora of coverage will be a tough task. We therefore offer the following interpretive guide:

A cut of .25%:

What the RBA means by this: Celebrate! Things are better than we thought. Good Lord, who knew? Best be watching inflation.
How The Australian calls it: RBA snub to Rudd.
How The Daily Telegraph calls it: P1: No cups cup day! Fashion slip special. P14: RBA rates ripoff!

A cut of .5%:

What the RBA means by this: We’re not out of the woods yet.
How The Australian calls it: RBA nudge leaves markets unmoved
How The Daily Telegraph calls it: Battler rates relief!

A cut of .75%:

What the RBA means by this: Bugger. Cancel Christmas. Warm up the Bentley.
How The Australian calls it: Swan economic plan in tatters
How The Daily Telegraph calls it: Cup cut joy! 

A cut of 1%:

What the RBA means by this: We’re all going to die.
How The Australian calls it: RBA falls in with Turnbull rate demand
How The Daily Telegraph calls it: Rate rapture!